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Five things I don’t understand about gym: YALL, CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN?

Five things I don’t understand about gym: YALL, CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN?

For couple weeks now, I’ve been going to the gym regularly. I like exercising for multiple reasons: it helps with my mental health, and it tires me out, so I sleep better.

Ideally, I’m also trying to lose some weight. Not because society told me to, but because I’d like to be healthier and therefore happier.

I like going to gym because I feel fantastic afterwards (hello, happy hormones) and because I genuinely feel satisfied, when I achieve something I wasn’t able to do before, i.e. run faster, lift heavier and so on.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve noticed some things that I see that I either don’t understand or that irritate me. Because this is my blog, I get to rant on here about those things. Sorry, not sorry.

Let’s go!

People that wear tons of makeup to the gym

Please, think of your skin — those poor pores.

“Makeup and sweat can clog pores and potentially cause breakouts,” dermatologist Annie Chiu told the Klog. And the gym is a breeding ground of things that will clog pores. Just think of all the unwashed machines and the towel you use. “Makeup gives bacteria something to cling to,” says Chiu.

If you’ve got acne-prone skin, it’s even worse. Exercise stimulates sweating, which in return increases oil activity in the skin.

I understand this must be a confidence thing or rather lack of, but surely it can’t be pleasant to work out with all that makeup on?

Like I’m all about sweating glitter all day any day, but… Then again, when I go out dancing and wear practically a plastic mask on my face, I also sweat some. Maybe it’s not that different from going to the gym?

What’s with all the grunting?

I get it, you lift, bro. But like why do you need to be making so much noise?

It irritates me so much when a dude (sorry for assuming your gender), goes up to a machine and firstly scans the area if anyone is watching them. Once they realise that no one gives a flying f, they add their weights on the bar in sullen silence. Then when they do the first set their mouth hole starts producing the most strange sounds ever, including some really questionable mouth farts. Like, get over yourself already.

Is the grunting, puffing and mouth farting really necessary?

Those ridiculous 35-something white women bouncing on their spin machine like a jackhammer

Okay. I’m sorry. I don’t want to offend anyone; this is just a personal pet peeve. I see it all the time.

I love spin classes (basically a non-overmarketed version of SoulCycle for those follow the Beckham families whereabouts).

Chances are a regular spinning class (high-intensity indoor cycling class) will have at least one set of some version of sprints (pedalling really f-ing fast). Sometimes it will be a climb (high resistance sprint), and sometimes it will be lower resistance sprint (getting those quads burning, baby).

What I don’t understand is when I see people doing low resistance sprints, and their resistance is set so low, they’re bouncing on their bike like a jackhammer. I swear to god, Jannet, you look ridiculous.

A comfortable resistance sprint speed should be around 100 to 120 rpm. If you’re bouncing in your seat and doing 170 rpm, you’re better off increasing your resistance. You will lose speed, which at first glance might seem the opposite of what you’re trying to achieve. However, Jannet,…

“The higher the resistance, the harder your body needs to work against it. You thereby burn more calories and can create lean muscle mass,” explains Rebecca Gahan, CPT, owner and founder of Kick@55 Fitness, a HIIT gym in Chicago to PopSugar. “You need to be moving your legs fast enough, with the right amount of resistance, to increase the amount of work you are doing overall,” says Gahan.

Why do I never look as cute in the gym wear as all those Insta girls?

I get it, I don’t have the booty, and I’m about 20lbs overweight. Seriously it’s so unfair. Every time I take a gym mirror selfie for my Instagram, I look like a potato trying to squeeze in one latex glove.

You’re welcome for this meme. It basically sums up what I’m trying to say perfectly.

Am I hot yet?

This is more of general frustration with myself. Exercising and working on yourself takes time and conscious effort. Sometimes it becomes frustrating if you’re not seeing results as fast as you’d like to. But you know what they say… If it were easy, it wouldn’t be worth it. Who am I? A rom-com? A coming-to-age novel?

You get the point.

Anyways, I’m off to the gym to have a word with Jannet – I promise to be kind. Maybe you should practice some kindness today as well?

K, peace.


1 Comment

  1. emma
    March 13, 2019 / 10:28 pm

    I agree! I actually wear a bit of make up to the gym because I go right after work, but the rest I agree with you! The grunting is the worst! I’ve started working out at a gym that has private workout cubes so I don’t have to deal with anyone else.

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